


The Count

by JessicaVIP



Category: The Old Guard (Movie 2020)
Genre: Canon Temporary Character Death, Canon-Typical Violence, Drabble, M/M, Mentions of Attempted Suicide, character introspection
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-16
Updated: 2020-08-16
Packaged: 2021-03-05 22:46:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 413
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25943056
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JessicaVIP/pseuds/JessicaVIP
Summary: As a rule, Yusuf and Nicolo never keep secrets from each other.
Relationships: Joe | Yusuf Al-Kaysani/Nicky | Nicolò di Genova
Comments: 7
Kudos: 212





	The Count

**Author's Note:**

> Just a little thing that's been nagging at me to be written down. I'm obsessed with the way Joe always waits for Nicky to wake up.

As a rule, Yusuf and Nicolo never keep secrets from each other. Yusuf keeps to this rule religiously. In the late night, he whispers his every thought to Nicky as he drifts to sleep, his lips brushing the soft hair at the nape of his lover’s neck. Nicky does the same, confessing his hopes and sins to Yusuf during the early morning before the others wake, his hoarse morning voice the early alarm that has started Yusuf’s day for a million lifetimes.

As a rule, Yusuf never keeps secrets from Nicolo. Except as a rule, Yusuf never tells Nicolo about The Count. Truly it isn’t a count, for who can keep count of the times you and your lover have died over 900 years.? It is more of a series of positives and negatives; the closer it is to zero the better. Every time Nicky dies, the number increases and Joe’s anxiety grows. When his own life is taken, Joe can feel himself relax The Count dropping down, keeping him and Nicky even. The figurative +1 sitting over Nicky’s head has been haunting Yusuf for weeks. A video plays in his head over and over: the gun in his mouth, the sick snap of a spinal cord, the slackened body hitting the floor as life leaves his eyes once again. The long seconds as Yusuf held his breath, waiting for his lover to start breathing again, are cold fingers keeping a grip on his heart.

As a rule, Yusuf does not tell Nicky about the deepest urge to slip out at night with a solid knife in his pocket. It would only take a few moments to bring The Count down to zero, a minute or two could even bring it down to a safe -3. Yusuf breathes in the warm scent of his lover as he sleeps, the other’s deep, even, breathing settling his own heart. They had made a promise centuries ago, as they had, once again, pulled Booker down from a noose in a seedy hostel. Instead, he pulls Nicolo closer, the solid beat of his heart against his chest a reminder that they were still alive, here, now.

As a rule, Yusuf does not explicitly tell Nicolo about The Count. Instead he presses it into every touch, every moment. Could Nicolo understand the words Yusuf pushed into his kisses? “If you died, there would be no god, no devil, no soul, safe from my fury, my insanity, my grief”


End file.
